PlatyRomance
by SnowStories
Summary: Usually, Agent P is a very serious and calm character, but how easily can a pretty girl turn that world upside down? Perry the Platypus has met someone, but can he keep up his professionalism? Or has his greatest weakness been exposed?
1. Chapter 1: The First Spark

Platy-Romance

Chapter One

The First Spark

"Hey, where's Perry?" Phineas asks. As always, Perry the Platypus feels a twinge of guilt as he scurries away from the boys. The guilt weighs more when he stops to think about all the fun the boys will have without him, but enough of that. As much as he would rather stay and watch the ingenuity that he usually misses out on, he has a job to do.

The platypus gives the hallway a quick glance before standing aright, placing his fedora on straight before tapping on the knee-high vent on his left. The grate of the vent shivers and slides away, revealing a slide of a tunnel leading deep underneath the house's foundation. Perry doesn't hesitate; he leaps, and finds himself sliding down, down, down, until finally, he lands with a rough thud in the middle of his lair. Before him, his usual chair and computer, and miscellaneous tech that he really never messes with. On the giant computer screen, looking as professional as ever, is Major Monogram, watching as Perry moves to sit in his chair.

"Agent P," Major starts, "Doofenshmirtz has been seen visiting a variety of areas within town, including the grocery store, the mall, and lastly, an auto repair shop. He's obviously up to some evil, terrible plan, and we need you to find out what it is, and stop him."

Perry takes this as his cue and gives the Major his routine salute before moving to leave.

"Hold on, Agent P, I'm not finished yet."

Perry stops and turns back, confused. Agent Monogram gives a slight nod.

"As you know, from time to time we have new animals joining the O.W.C.A and they require field training before being assigned to their own evil scientist and host family. We need you to train one of our newest recruit. Agent P, meet Agent Ma."

The floor on his left shifts and lowers, revealing a hole, soon filled by a rising platform. Perry gives the new agent a double take, eyes bulging, his fedora tilting crookedly.

She is the most beautiful thing he has ever seen. Her feathers a soft lime green, preened and smoothed down, contrastingly perfectly with the felted brown fedora angled on her head. Her eyes are beautiful, pure blue, sparkling lightly at him. Her eyelashes must be at least a couple inches long, her posture strong, confident, and that beak! So slim, so curved, and so orange! Everything else in the world has gone dark; all he can see is her, and her absolute beauty.

"Carl, what's going on with the lights?"

"Sorry Sir, I thought a spot light would be appropriate."

"Well stop it. I'm trying to talk to Agent P."

The rest of the lair's lights returned, Perry reluctantly turns back to the monitor, unable to resist keeping the bird in his peripherals.

Major Monogram continues. "As you can see, Agent Ma is a bird. Why we gave her Ma as a code name I haven't the slightest—"

"Well she's actually a Macaw, sir, not just a bird."

"Huh…then why don't we call her Agent M?"

"Because we already have two Agent M's, sir. One is a mouse, and the other is a monkey."

"Oh…well I can see how that can get confusing. Still, kinda goes against tradition. Does her real name at least start with an M?"

"Yes sir, it's Mary."

"Oh good. That's alright then. Ok Agent P, we need you to take Agent Ma on your mission today, to show her the ropes. And stop Doofenshmirtz! Dismissed."

The screen goes blank and Perry feels himself freeze up. Trembling, he turns towards Mary, awkwardly scratching his back and trying his best to avoid eye contact. _What should I say?_ he thinks to himself.

Mary gives Perry a cool tilt of her head, catching the lair's bright light perfectly on her shiny orange beak. Trying not to panic, Perry settles on giving her a nervous chirp before jumping off the chair and leading her to a tunnel just a few feet away, where his typical hovercraft is parked. Mary hops after him, giving a thankful caw as he opens the passenger seat's door. After helping her in, he jumps into the driver's seat and starts the engine, steering it through a newly opened tunnel and out into the world.

_I should ask her about herself,_ Perry thinks to himself, _get to know her some…_

No! He can't think about this now. He has a job to do.

The purple building ahead of him is an oddly familiar shape, but he has never been able to put his bill on exactly what it reminds him of. Ignoring this aggravation – as well as ignoring the background theme song announcing their arrival at Doofenshmirtz Evil Incorporated –, he lands the hovercraft lightly on the tower's patio.

"Ah, Perry the—," Doofenshmirtz starts from just a few feet away but Perry holds up a finger, pausing the now confused, evil scientist. Calm only on the outside, the platypus gets out of the hovercraft, walks around to the other side, and opens Mary's door. She hops out, coolly chirping up at him.

_That's a smile,_ he thinks to himself, _now smile back._

He tries, but only manages a nervous chirp of his own. Trying not to blush, he points to Doofenshmirtz, who's still standing there, his face a twist of confusion.

"Who's this?" Doofenshmirtz asks.

Mary pulls her fedora off, tugs a business card out from a secret pocket inside, and then whips the hat back on her head. With a hop and bound, she flies over to the scientist, handing him the card before returning to Perry's side.

Doofenshmirtz reads the card aloud. "Mary 'Agent Ma' the Macaw, agent-in-training, Phone Number 555-43—', oh I see. You're mentoring her today, oh that's nice. I wish you had told me sooner though, so I could have set a larger trap to give the two of you more room but…"

A button seems to manifest out of nowhere and is pressed before Perry can so much as give a fighting stance. Shot from some hidden cannon not far away is a variety of colored hula hoops, dropped onto the two agents and contracting instantly, pulling the two unbearably close to each other, arms – and wings – pinned to their sides.

Doofenshmirtz takes a few steps closer. "Now you see? You two aren't really uncomfortable, are you? Sorry, but you know this wouldn't have happened if you had just told me about the new girl sooner. Now then! To my evil plan!"

Being trapped by an evil scientist bent on taking over the Tri-State Area is great experience for Mary, but Perry can't help but feel a little self-conscious and horribly aware of the close knit space between them.

_Focus, _he tells himself. This is the important part; Doofenshmirtz is explaining his evil plan; he can't zone out on it now.

"Ok," the man says, tugging his lab coat proudly, "so I was running a bunch of errands all over town today, you know, going shopping for groceries and for some new shoes and I had to take my car in because there was this weird squeaky sound coming from under the hood and it was really starting to annoy me, plus I wasn't sure if it was something important or not and I didn't want to take any chances so…anyways! While I was out, I noticed something. Everywhere I went, every store I stopped at, there were people walking around messing with their cell phones. Seriously, you see it everywhere; people talking on them, texting on them, playing games, checking the time and then checking it again because the first time they checked it they weren't even paying attention. It's really rude, especially when they totally ignore you or when they're walking really slowly in front of you and you can't get past them so you have to go slow too. It's so annoying! And so, I built my Cellphonedestroyinator!"

Perry shuffles a bit, wobbling from side to side, trying to get closer to see this new invention and maybe spot the self-destruct button. Doubtless there is one. But wobbling like this, with Mary strapped to his back, all he manages is to lose his balance and trip them both over, rolling on the floor like a roll of toilet paper.

_Great job, Perry_, the Platypus thought to himself angrily. Doofenshmirtz doesn't notice, he just keeps going on explaining his new plot.

"You see, this Cellphonedestroyinator will completely obliterate all cellphones with in a twenty mile radius, leaving people to finally take notice of their surroundings. Finally, no more texting and driving, no more annoying people talking really obnoxiously on their cell phone during a movie, no more teenagers squealing on the phone with their best friend about some boy they really like, you know, that sort of thing. I actually think this will benefit humanity but it'll really make a lot of people mad, so it's still, you know, evil. Now, just let me put in a few coordinates and we'll be ready to go."

Perry twists a bit and stares into Mary's eyes, trying not to feel the weakness in his knees. He cheeps, keeping professional.

_Now's when we escape, _he tries to converse to her. She seems to understand him easily enough. With a serious – if not flattering – nod, she bends her head and clamps her beak around the closest hula hoop. A few bites, some gnawing, and the trap has been ruined, loosening their constraints enough to release the two agents. Perry jumps out, landing on his webbed feet, his arms straightened in a threating martial arts way. Mary springs up beside him, hovering over the ground, claws arched and sharp.

Doofenshmirtz leaps up in surprise. "Perry the Platypus! And…Mary the Macaw! How did you get out of that?" He notices the chewed up hula hoops and slouches. "Oh, you chewed through it…hmm, I guess I should have built those with something other than flimsy plastic but I didn't count on you having a sharp enough beak too…oh well forget it. You live and you learn I guess."

Right on schedule, Perry jumps up several feet, giving Doofenshmirtz a swift kick in the stomach, knocking him over. The agent lands, sturdy as always, ignoring Doofenshmirtz complaining.

_I hope she saw that,_ he thinks to himself. With a purr, he points at the new doomsday device. Mary jumps and flies, landing gracefully on the Cellphonedestroyinator, surveying it for the self-destruct button.

Doofenshmirtz gets up, rubbing his stomach as if it's upset. "Ugh, I shouldn't have eaten such a big lunch before I started this evil plan," he complains as he uses his new invention to help him stay up. He leans against the contraption, his coat snags on a lever and pulls it. The machine fires up and from the ray gun on top shoots a pink laser off into the distance, far out of sight. Perry swears he hears an extremely familiar teenage girl scream echoing out from of the suburbs but he ignores it. While Doofenshmirtz marvels at the workings, Perry and Mary search for the fail safe.

There! On the side paneling, next to the dial pad! Mary hops over to it, smiles, and pecks at the large red button. There's a series of beeps, of quaking. The macaw flips backwards and flies back to her mentor, using her claws to pick him up by the shoulders, flying him off the building and away from the explosion and the spoiled Doofenshmirtz behind them.

"Curse you Perry the Platypus…and…Mary the Macaw! Jeez, that's a mouthful isn't it? Kinda…kinda dampens the cursing-towards-the-sky thing, huh? I'm really glad I usually only have to face one nemesis at a time."

Mary glides through Danville's streets, keeping hold of Perry. The platypus looks up at her, smiling at how the sunlight catches her lime green feathers. The macaw looks down at him and returns the smile, making eye contact that Perry is too nervous – or perhaps too thrilled – to break. That is, until a loud honking catches their attention, revealing a large semi-truck heading straight towards them.

A swish of his large beaver tail changes their flight pattern and they narrowly avoid getting hit. Getting over the shock, the two laugh together before finally reaching the Flynn-Fletcher home in the suburbs.

Mary gently places Perry down before landing beside him. Awkwardly, the two stand there, looking at each other, unsure how to say goodbye, before Perry holds his paw out. She smiles and holds out her wing and the two shake. Thinking that that's that, Perry turns to leave but Mary stops him, placing her wing on his shoulder. He turns and from her fedora, Mary pulls out her business card, tapping at it to point out her cell number before handing it to him. He takes it and smiles at her, tipping his hat coolly. She chirps and flies off, looking back at him with a grin.

Slipping the card inside his front pocket, Perry heads to the backyard, where the boys are just wrapping up their day's events. He removes his fedora, falls on all fours and patters out for his owners to see him.

"Oh, there you are Perry," Phineas says.

Perry gives his typical crackle. If only he could tell them about how great of a day he had.


	2. Chapter 2: Unprofessional

Platy-Romance

Chapter 2

Unprofessional

Over the next few weeks, a routine was formed. Perry would wake up every morning with Phineas and Ferb, sharing breakfast with them at the family table, relaxing outside with them by the great tree, and then, just as the boys begin their day, Perry would retreat to his secret lair, to receive his mission, meet up with Mary, and head out to stop Doofenshmirtz and his evil plot. Perry found that working with Mary was probably the best part of his day, especially after the evil scientist was defeated, since that was when he and his apprentice would spend some time together before heading back home.

The days passed like a montage. A lot of times they would just go to the park to walk and chirp at each other. Other times they would grab lunch at various places, or ice cream from a nice Sunday shop down the street. Every now and then they would go to the neighborhood arcade and play each other at air hockey, usually with Mary winning by mostly pure skill alone. Once the two even went to catch a late night movie after the boys had gone to bed.

After all of this, Perry had come to one serious conclusion.

It was time to make a move.

"Hey, where's Perry?" Phineas asks. Perry has already slipped past the group of kids, around the tree, to the back fence, and down the appearing rabbit hole hidden behind a fern bush. He lands on what is designed to be a descending escalator, leading him back down to his lair.

Major Monogram's face is on the monitor, distracted by something off screen when he notices Perry walking into the room.

"Agent P…we didn't page you. Is something wrong?"

Perry is too distracted to answer. Flipping Mary's business card between his fingers, he climbs onto his chair, idly pressing a button on the keyboard. Monogram's face instantly disappears mid-sentence, revealing a blank screen and calling pad.

Perry's heart starts to pound. His legs shake, his palms begin to sweat. His hand is tremblingly annoyingly as he punches the numbers in.

_Calm down,_ he thinks. He takes a deep breath, controlling the twitching almost fully, before pressing the "Call" button. One ring, two, three, and suddenly, Mary's face is on the screen, every one of her beautiful features multiplied.

She gives a smile, a light caw, and he's frozen once again. He twiddles his thumb, avoids eye contact, angles his fedora, and twists his tail before finally taking another deep breath. He chirps, purrs, and holds up a restaurant menu he had in his pocket.

_Please…please…_

Mary gives a smile, points at her watch and holds up four of her wing feathers before signing off. Perry is clicking his heels as soon as she's gone. She said yes! He asked her out on a date, and she said yes!

The hard part was over, but Perry still had to get ready. He only had a few hours until four o'clock; he had to get on it.

There is a nice, swollen mud puddle in the backyard just before the glass doors. Perry removes his fedora, crawls out into the open and purrs, instantly getting Phineas and Ferb's attention.

"Oh, there you are Perry," Phineas says. Perry takes that as his cue; a few straight steps, and suddenly he's ankle deep in mud. He rolls, back and forth, drenching himself in the filth.

Phineas gasps. "Perry, what are you doing?! You're getting mud all over yourself!"

The boy pulls his pet out of the mud and slumps before turning to his brother. "Well, I guess I know what we're going to do today, Ferb. We're going to give Perry a bath!"

If there is one thing he can count on the boys doing, it's being efficient. By the time Perry was done with his bath, he was spotless and squeaky clean, smelling like blueberries, with his bill so polished he can almost see his reflection in it. Content with his cleanliness, he retreats back down to his lair, opening a side paneling in the far wall, revealing a closet. Other than an array of fedoras and a few disguises, all he has to wear is his tux, the one with the red bow tie.

_Perfect,_ he thinks. It takes some time to get the bow tie straight, and he can't help but look over himself in the mirror a few dozen times, but finally, he feels that he's ready.

As nervous as he is, he's more excited than anything else. At 3:45, he sneaks out of the house, avoiding the boys and the rest of the family. Stopping only once to pick up a bouquet of lilac flowers from a florist in town, Perry heads to the restaurant, standing outside and gripping the flowers tightly due to sheer anxiety.

And he waits.

_She's just a few minutes late. No big deal._

And waits.

_Maybe she got held up in traffic…_

And waits.

_She'll at least call…_

Rainclouds start to swallow the darkening sky. By the time the sun has set, the rain has fallen, and Perry is left standing there, soaked, the flowers wilted in his hand. Slouched, slumped, and down, he begins to walk away, dropping the bouquet in the street and loosening his bowtie. A depressing sad song follows him home, not stopping until he reaches the garage. Down whatever secret entrance there was – he was too distracted to notice which one he used – and back into the lair, Perry removes his tux and fedora, then returns back to the house, wanting nothing more than to go to bed.

"Oh, there you are Perry," Phineas says, "It's weird; usually you only disappear once a day, not twice. Hey, are you ok buddy?"

Perry can't even muster up his usual chirp, and he keeps forgetting to turn walled eyed. He just can't focus anymore.

Phineas leans down to look Perry in the face.

"Huh, he seems really sad. What do you think Ferb?"

Ferb kneels down and places a comforting hand on Perry's head. "Yes; almost as if he was stood up on a romantic date."

"That doesn't make sense Ferb. Perry's a platypus. They don't do much."

"Ah true."

The platypus follows the boys into their room and jumps onto Ferb's bed, curled up as much as he can. His eyes are closed before either one of the boys can lay down, but he doesn't fall asleep until several hours later, only to find himself caught up in unrelenting dreams about Mary and the failed date.

Early the next morning, his wrist watch starts to beep. Unrested and in a foul mood, Perry walks into the hallway to answer the call.

"Agent P," Major Monogram starts, "Sorry for waking you up so early, but Dr. Doofenshmirtz has already gotten to work on his new doomsday device and we need you and Agent Ma to investigate."

Perry grits his teeth and clenches his fist in frustration. Fed up with just the sound of Mary's name, the platypus takes hold of the watch and rips it from his wrist.

"Agent P? Agent P, what's going on?" Monogram calls. Perry surveys the room, finding a nice potted plant just a few feet away. With a tug, he pulls the shrub out, dirt and all, and shoves the watch to the bottom of the vase, replacing the plant and storming back into the room, curling up on the edge of Phineas' bed. The boy stirs and wakes up, looking down at his pet.

"You feeling better, bud?" he asks.

_No, _Perry thinks,_ I feel worse._


	3. Chapter 3: Feeling Better?

Platy-Romance

Chapter 3

Feeling Better?

Perry never went down to his lair that afternoon. Unable to bring himself to face Major Monogram – and especially unable to face Mary – he decided that he would take some unscheduled time off. This day was for him, for his thoughts, and for every bit of emotion struggling inside him.

_A walk. I need a walk._

His leash is stored in the front room's coat closet. He scuttles in and tugs it out with his bill, ignoring the secret lair entrance behind the umbrella stand. He trails after Phineas with the leash, and is slightly relieved that the boy agrees to take him on a walk.

And then he regrets it, because every place in town reminds him of the last few weeks. That time at the park when he choked on a watermelon seed and she had to kick him in the stomach to get it out. The night at the roller rink when they won first prize to a skating contest they hadn't even entered. The bowling alley, where he had to help her bowl because her claws couldn't hold the ball properly. He had hoped that the walk would clear his head, help him realize that he can get over everything, but all it did was make him even more depressed.

He had had enough. With a tug on his leash and the lightest chirp, he convinces the boys to turn around and take him home.

"Huh, Perry still looks pretty down," Phineas comments on the way. "Poor little guy. Ferb, I know what we're going to do today. We're going to cheer Perry up!"

The boy's new invention is taking up half the backyard, and they still aren't done. Perry rests underneath the usual tree, watching his owners put their new creation together. So far, he isn't sure what the end product will be, but it's starting to look like a giant pet bed, several stories tall, supplied with miscellaneous entertainments specifically designed to pamper him, such as robotic hands that pet, a hot tub to bathe in, a full gourmet kitchen, and a disco room.

The platypus closes his eyes, hoping for a nap, when an annoying beeping sound distracts him. He has spent the entire day trying to ignore Monogram's attempts to page him, hoping that he can put his secret agent life aside just this once, but these last few hours he's felt a gnawing feeling deep down, the same sort of guilt he gets when he abandons Phineas and Ferb for the day.

_What if it's important…?_

With a roll of his eyes, Perry stands and swings behind the tree, not even bothering to put on his fedora before picking up the rock half hidden in the grass. Underneath it, built into the dirt, is a small screen, with Monogram's face staring up at him.

"Agent P!" he shouts, "We've been trying to get a hold of you all day! We can't seem to get in touch with Agent Ma, and our tracking satellites have lost sight of her since yesterday evening."

Perry's eyes widen. Has she gone rogue, or…

"We believe Doofenshmirtz is behind this. We need you to…Agent P?"

The agent is already gone. He drops into his lair through the elevator tube, and then sprints down to his hovercraft before he can put his fedora on his head. This time, Doofenshmirtz has crossed a line.

It's not at all unheard of for Perry to crash through the evil scientist's wall, but never has he done it with so much fury. Doofenshmirtz is on the couch, in his underwear, watching TV and eating a sandwich when the platypus bursts into the room.

"Perry the Platypus!" Doofenshmirtz shouts, "Oh now you decide to show up! Of course! I've been putting laundry off all day because I've been waiting for you to get here to foil me, and when I finally figured that you weren't coming and that I can just go ahead and start laundry, now is when you decide to show up! Well, I'm sorry I'm only wearing my underwear for this but you have no one else to blame but yourself. Now, let's get started, we're way behind schedule."

Perry's eyes narrow at the nemesis, but with no sight of Mary, he hasn't lost his temper just yet. He watches as the evil scientist stands, points a device at the agent, and presses the single blue button. From somewhere above, a pillow falls, trapping Perry's body inside the fabric and stuffing, with only his head exposed.

"Ok," Doof starts, "so here's the backstory. It all happened when I was a little kid in Drusselstein. There was this bully that would always like to pick on me, and one day decided to tickle me. I know what you're thinking, but you see gleeful laughter was really frowned upon so it was absolute torture, plus tickling really hurts, doesn't it? I mean, your sides start hurting and it feels like your spleen is about to burst, and no matter what you try, all you can do is laugh as if you actually like. Anyways, this guy tickled me so much and I laughed so hard, that I ended up peeing my pants. Everyone laughed at me and it was totally humiliating. And that's why I've created the Tickleinator!"

With a flourished whip of a tarp, a large ray gun is revealed, pointed out of the window, its buttons beeping and blinking. Doofenshmirtz beams. "You see, this machine will curse anyone who's hit by it to be tickled until they pee their pants, embarrassing them in front of all of their peers!" and here he gives an evil laugh before adding: "the only problem is that I had to have something to generate the tickleness, but I didn't want to buy anything because, well, with all of the failed evil plots and having to repair the doors you've broken down, I've been on a budget lately, and every penny saved counts, you know? Luckily, I was walking down the street when I came up with this invention and there was this really pretty green bird right there, and I realized that feathers are perfect for tickling and so I caught it!

The scientist opens a square panel underneath the machine. Trapped in what looks like a giant, glass D battery is a frantic green macaw in a brown felt fedora.

Doofenshmirtz gaps at the prisoner. "Mary the Macaw? How did you get in there? Where did that pretty green bird go?"

Now, Perry's mad.

Flicked from the roof of his bill is a plastic retainer, with a pair of self-automated scissors hidden inside. Perry uses them to cut the fabric of the pillow, releasing feathers everywhere, and allowing him to escape. The agent sprints, jumps into the air, and twists, slapping Doofenshmirtz in the face with his beaver tail. The scientist gives an "umph" and falls backward, hitting the ray gun, pushing a lever up to "full power" by mistake. He stands up slowly, rubbing his jaw.

"You know," he starts, "in retrospect, I guess I could have used the feathers from that pillow to power my machine. But oh well, I'm too lazy to change it now. Here we go."

He presses the red button, excited. Perry stares in shock as the machine fires up, trembles, and bounces. The battery underneath begins to glow a soft pink, and Mary caws in pain, falling to her side, shaking as if electrocuted. The Tickleinator twists, aiming indoors, its ray firing in all directions as it swings, catching Doofenshmirtz off guard with a tempered blast. The doctor falls to the ground, laughing hysterically, and tears forming in his eyes. Another detonation fires at the agent, but he jumps backwards, missing it by a hair. Perry looks up from where he lands, watching Mary squirm within the glass. His eyes narrowed to slits, the platypus runs, zigzagging to avoid getting hit. With a baseball player's slide, he reaches the glass cage, using his fist to punch and break the glass. The machine sputters to a stop, as Perry reaches in and pulls Mary out, cradling her in both hands. For a few seconds, he looks unto her in absolute terror, fearing the worst, but weakly, she opens her eyes and gives him a reassuring smile.

He smiles back, relaxing his shoulders, before picking her up. With a light kick, he presses the machine's self-destruct hidden on the panel's door. The invention begins to smoke as the two agents casually leave the room, macaw in platypus arms.

Doofenshmirtz is still wiggling on the floor, gasping for air between laughs. "C-curse you, P-Perry the P-P-Platypus! Curse y-you! Oh, and here comes the pee. At least I'm already doing laundry."

Perry lowers the hovercraft into his lair, then moves to help Mary out from the passenger seat. She's weak, but significantly better than when the two had finished the mission. He holds her hand, gently leading her off the platform. Standing before him, Mary looks up, coolly giving a thankful smile. Perry's knees start to shake again but this time, he refuses to let it phase him. Like a charming spy from a cheesy old movie, Perry pulls the macaw close, leaning in, keeping eye contact until the very last second, when he—

"Agent P!"

The two agents pull away, surprised, their kiss interrupted and stopped in its tracks. Major Monogram looks on the two with a raised eyebrow.

"Oh, sorry. I see I've interrupted…don't mind me, I just needed to inform you that Agent Ma's field training has ended. Congratulations, Agent Ma, and welcome to the force. Carl is faxing you your certification as we speak."

From Perry's 1990's fax machine, a paper is printed. The platypus takes the diploma, handing it to Mary with a look of depression on his face. The two make eye contact, sadness swelling, realizing what this means.

"Agent Ma, please return to the agency so that we can assign you to your own super villain and host family," Monogram finishes.

Perry slumps, eyes down casted, before giving his now ex-apprentice a sad smile. From his front pocket, he retrieves his own business card, his phone number already circled. He hands the card to the bird, his usual anxiety returning.

_Call me, when you get settled in_, he thinks to himself. He scratches the back of his head before giving Mary on awkward solute.

Mary just shakes her head, smiles calmly, and leans in, giving Perry a quick kiss on the bill. He's absolutely frozen in surprise, and isn't even able to return her wink. All he can do is watch as she moves to leave the room, and smiles when she looks back at him.

Suddenly over his nerves, Perry stands straight and gives the macaw a final wave and the friendliest of chirps for a goodbye.

Perry returns to the surface, crawling back underneath the tree in his usual pet guise. Candace is staring, gaping, at where the colossal pet bed had once been but is now missing. The boy's mother shakes her head and goes inside, no doubt planning on baking a pie for the kids to enjoy. Phineas however, looks almost as bummed as his sister.

"Oh, there you are Perry," the boy says almost sadly, before turning around and giving the platypus a long look. "Huh…well we didn't get to show you the really cool pet paradise we created but, it looks like you don't need it anymore anyhow. You look like you're feeling a lot better now."

Perry resists the urge to smile.

_Yes. Yes I am. _


End file.
